Summer is winding down and we're all still coming to terms with how awesome the Avengers movie was. I still didn't get the Iron Man Cereal I've been craving for years but that pain was eased slightly by the abundance of Avengers merchandise that I never dreamed I'd be able to own...until now.
So let's have a look at some of the more interesting items that came about from the
Marvel Cash Grab Avengers promotional machine:
10. Avengers Assault Cycles - I went to the movie theater with the absolute expectation that there would be a scene where all of the Avengers rode their own custom motorcycles. It was the only part of the film that disappointed me.
9. Avengers Swim Goggles - Remember that scene where they all put on goggles...and then...you know...went swimming...
8. Avengers Bowling Set - "You got peanut butter in my chocolate!" I think you know where I'm going with this.
7. Various Avengers Soap/Shampoo/Shower Gel/etc. - Now there's no part of you that can't be soaped up and scrubbed down...Avengers Style!
6. Avengers Lip Balm Rings - "Oh my your lips are moist and glistening! What's your secret?" "Why, just look at my fingers!" Also, Avengers!
5. Avengers Fruit Snacks - I usually devote an entire blog entry to super hero themed fruit snacks (as seen HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE and HERE) but the ability and inclination to write eight paragraphs over and over again about what is essentially the same product is both fleeting and elusive. Damn you, Muse! I will find you again in time for Iron Man 3!!
4. Avengers Wet Wipes - Never before has wiping been such an action packed thrill ride!
3. Avengers Candy/Fan - Remember when you'd be eating candy and then get all sweaty and wouldn't know what to do with yourself? Those days are over now.
2. Avengers Lottery Tickets - I won a dollar from each of these beauties! Who's the emotionally crippled man-child now!?!?
1. Avengers Cologne - The only item on this list that I didn't personally acquire. (Mainly because I didn't want to spend $30.00 to smell like the Hulk.) The Fab Four are represented in this box set, but not to worry, Loki, Nick Fury and Black Widow also have fragrances available on the official website (Hawkeye? No, of course not.)
See you all on May 1, 2015!!